Saturday, June 21, 2008

On the heat

If you read my post from yesterday, you've no doubt gleaned that it's hot in Los Angeles right now. Of course, being a beach dweller I have the advantage of experiencing temperatures that are a good ten degrees lower than those living in L.A. proper; however, I also live in an apartment with high, uncovered windows, direct exposure to sunlight for extended periods of the day, and no central air. We do have an R2D2-sized AC unit, but it is most efficent when you crounch in front of it - we're asking a lot if we want our entire living room cooled.

As I lay in bed this morning, sweating from the heat I had slept through, I found myself wondering: would I rather be too cold or too warm?

First, let me establish that I have experience with both extremes. I've traveled to Israel in the summer, driven through Arizona and Texas with temperatures well into the 100s and lived through my share of heat waves back east. I also attended Syracuse University, whose climate resembles the ice planet Hoth for 7 months of the year. Having compared both situations, I came up with this list of pros and cons for each:


- Don't have to put on so much damn clothing
- Can swim in an outdoor pool without risk of hypothermia
- Ice Cream now an acceptible substitute for a nutritious lunch
- 4th of July provides a great opportunity to overeat, get drunk AND play with dangerous, flammable objects

- Constant sweating causes body odor issues, makes you stick to all leather furniture.
- That one dance song you hate will become a teen anthem, and you will hear it everywhere, since school's out.
- 4 words: Fat People in Swimsuits.
- Disneyland now crowded EVERYDAY.


- The ethereal glow of moonlight on fresh fallen snow
- You're SUPPOSED to be fat right now - it's how the body insulates against the cold
- It's ok for adults to wear pajamas - even footies
- Disneyland less crowded during schooldays

- The unbearable walk to and from your car when you must park outside
- Shrinkage
- The patch of black ice that YOUR dumb ass will slip on
- It's fucking FREEZING out there!

In the end, I find it really hard to pick one: when it's hot, I wish it were cold; when it's chilly, I long for the heat of summer. I do know this: living in Southern California seriously warps your sense of temperature.


Dan said...

Dude... when I was in LA a couple months ago, they were making a big deal about how it was going to be in the mid '90s... and I was concerned but you know when they say "it's not the heat, it's the humidity"? That's 100% true. 96 degrees like you guys get is pretty nice. 96 degrees like we get in Connecticut is another story altogether!